“It takes a work of art to see a work of art.”
Ben Okri
Rejection can really hurt.
I don’t know many people who like it, and if you know someone who does, I would make an educated guess and say that they must be very spiritual and grounded, as it takes years of wisdom and experience to see beyond the situation where someone is turning their back on us.
Like I mentioned in last week’s blog, rejection can hurt because our value feels compromised or unappreciated. It hurts because we expected a different outcome (especially if it comes from people we loved or trusted) and it also hurts because we feel dispensable and this conflicts with our desire to feel special, unique and valuable.
But like the quote above, it’s important to realise that not everyone we meet, befriend, work with or talk to will appreciate or understand the artwork that we are. It takes a work of art to see a work of art in people exactly like it does in a gallery. But we also have to consider that like art, not everyone may enjoy the same style or genre or even visiting a gallery in the first place. But that doesn’t mean that they have anything against you personally; just simply, you might not be their cup of tea.
Which brings me to reasons: the second point from the title.
Sometimes we are rejected and for some reason or another, our path diverges and we may walk alone or with a different group to the one before. Many times in my life, while I was initially heart-broken from the rejection, in retrospect I realised that whatever happened, unfolded for a reason that I couldn’t clearly see at the time because I was so deeply submerged in the situation, people or thought. But, after some space, time and reflection, I often realised that everything happened how it had to happen and the people and circumstances were actually there for a reason. Once I grasped the lessons, accepted the teachings and let go of the hurt, anger or humiliation, I felt empowered to keep trudging forth and learning and growing from everything that happened.
Once we understand the reason/s for the rejection, we can see that the rejection was necessary in redirecting us towards something that aligns us better with our identity, personality and destiny. It also adds to our growth, education and development. Naturally, it’s hard to appreciate the reasons at the time, but if you look back at everything you’ve ever been rejected from and the people who rejected you, can you see how they lead you to this point in time?
To finalise, be grateful for everything you’ve ever been rejected from and anyone who has rejected you. It is because of those situations and people that you are the artwork you are and the masterpiece you are becoming.
And if you aren’t everyone’s cup of tea, that’s okay too.
So long as you have a few people who see the value you bring to their life, that’s all that matters.
And those are the only people you need.
2 comments
Great post Anna! This is something I’ve definitely felt and have come to terms with throughout my life. While the sting of rejection is still there whenever it happens, as you said, you realize that it’s a small price to pay for what comes next and how truly amazing your life is when you’re rejected from things that don’t serve you even if you can’t see or don’t feel it.
Thank you . I truly believe that all is for a reason. I still get hurt, sad, annoyed at times but have also learned that all i have to do is learn and grow. How easy is that anyone can do it. That is my goal every morning " learn something " from my daily experiences.